These are guidelines which everyone needs to be reminded of once in a while. They are not rules. Well I guess they are in the sense that they are likely to be broken. On to the analysis –
Human life is intrinsically about choices. We have the ability to dictate our futures, whereas Fido, does not. So here are some choices I advise you to make:
1) Put the pong ball down. Do not participate in drinking contests.
2) Bulimia was so 1999. Do not throw up your food because your mind is telling you to.
3) You are only 5 for exactly 365 days. Stop pouting about how hard and unfair life is.
Oh, and do not write rules that you yourself cannot follow (this is a tricky one, but one that I am very good at).
This has been a verbal diarrhea episode provided by Jelly. Blah.